Sometimes A Little Selfishness Can Be Healthy

Like most things in life success requires strong desire and a sense of purpose.  You must prepare yourself to succeed.  It was well over thirty years before I was “ready” to lose weight, get more fit and lead a healthier lifestyle.  But once I was ready, the determination, focus and discipline necessary to succeed came more easily than expected.  As it turns out, to a large extent, habits are habits.  Once established, healthy habits are not that much more difficult to maintain than unhealthy habits.  The more good habits I developed, the more disciplined and more successful I became.

And while I was surprised by my rapid progress, I was also surprised by the guilt I sometimes experienced.  My initial transformation from a sedentary, unhealthy lifestyle to a more active and healthy lifestyle required a substantial degree of selfishness.  During the late stages of my weight loss - summer 2012, the last forty-five pounds or so, I put myself and my commitment to weight loss before everything and everyone else in my life – including my family.  Since I did the cooking, my family ate what I ate.  I asked my wife and children not to keep certain foods around the house.  If we went out to eat, it had to be somewhere where I could eat a healthy meal.  No matter where we were or what we were doing, even on vacation, my diet and exercise were priorities.  At one point, I jokingly referred to summer 2012 as, “the summer of Bill.”

At times, I struggled with my selfishness. I knew that I was being selfish.  I worried about it.  I felt bad about it.  Sometimes my selfishness even made me feel bad about myself.  After all, selfishness is ordinarily not considered a virtue.  But in the short term, for me at least, I sincerely believe that a certain degree of selfishness was a key to my success.  And in the long run, that selfishness gave me the freedom to do what I needed to do to be successful.  It allowed me to lose weight, get active and become healthier.  But I was not the only person who gained something from my selfishness.  My family gained a happier, healthier husband and father; a person who has the energy and desire to fully participate in everyone’s life – hopefully for a very long time to come.

If you want to truly be there for your friends and family, you first need to be there for yourself.  Sometimes, a little selfishness can go a long way toward a healthier you!